Alright, alright, let’s talk about this… this… uh… “northside princess lipgloss”, whatever that fancy name means. I ain’t no city gal, ya know? But I know a thing or two about lookin’ good, even if it’s just for milkin’ the cows. So, this lipgloss stuff, it’s gotta make your lips shiny, right? Like when you eat a whole greasy chicken all by yourself. Hehehe.
First things first, I heard you gotta heat it up sometimes if it gets all gunky. Now, don’t go burnin’ the house down. You get yourself a bowl, not plastic mind you, somethin’ sturdy. Pour some hot water in it, not boilin’ like a mad kettle, just hot enough to make your hand go “ouch” if you keep it in too long. Then you stick that lipgloss tube in there, lid on tight, mind you, wouldn’t want water gettin’ in and messin’ things up. Let it sit there, maybe count to ten real slow-like, ten full minutes, not those fast city-folk counts. That way, all that… that… makeup stuff that sticks to the sides, it’ll go right down to the bottom where it belongs.
What makes a good lipgloss anyway? Well, I reckon it shouldn’t feel like you smeared glue on your lips, sticky and tacky. And it shouldn’t taste like dirt neither. A little bit of sweetness is nice, like them candies the grandkids bring around sometimes. Shiny is important, gotta catch the light, ya know? Make your lips look all plump and juicy, like a ripe tomato in the garden.
- Shiny, real shiny, gotta sparkle like the sun on the water.
- Not sticky, don’t want my lips glued shut.
- Tastes good, a little bit sweet is nice.
- Long lasting, don’t want it disappearing after one sip of coffee.
Now, I hear tell some folks are sellin’ this lipgloss stuff for a pretty penny. And some places, they got all sorts of deals and fancy things. They call it… “best price” and “outstanding quality” and all that jazz. They got a whole bunch of different kinds, too. Makes my head spin, all this choice. Back in my day, we just used beet juice, and that was that. But times change, I guess. And if these city folks want to spend their money on shiny lips, well, that’s their business. But you don’t gotta break the bank, I tell ya. Sometimes the simple things are the best.
I also heard tell some folks like to pre-order this stuff, like it’s some kinda special occasion. They get all excited and mark their calendars. Reminds me of waitin’ for the harvest, all that anticipation. But this is just lipgloss, ain’t it? Still, I guess it makes folks happy, so who am I to judge? If they wanna get their hands on it early, that’s their business. Maybe it’s got some special shine, or a fancy flavor. Or maybe they just like the thrill of the chase. City folks are strange sometimes.
How to apply this lipgloss, you ask? Well, it ain’t rocket science. You just take that little wand thingy and swipe it across your lips. Don’t be shy, get it all over. You can even smack your lips together a few times, just like you do after eatin’ somethin’ delicious. And if you wanna get fancy, you can use a lip liner first, to make sure it stays put. But me? I just slap it on and go. Ain’t got time for all that fussin’.
And what about colors? Well, I reckon pink is always a good choice. Makes you look all fresh and rosy. But red is nice too, if you’re feelin’ bold. And then there’s all those other colors, the ones with the fancy names I can’t even pronounce. Peach and coral and whatnot. Just pick somethin’ that makes you feel good, that’s what I say. Don’t matter what the city folks are wearin’. You do you.
So, there you have it. My two cents on this… this… “northside princess lipgloss.” It’s gotta be shiny, not sticky, maybe a little sweet. And it shouldn’t cost a fortune, unless you’re one of them fancy city gals. But most importantly, it should make you feel good. And that, my friends, is the real secret to lookin’ good, no matter where you come from or how old you are. Just a little bit of shine, a little bit of sweetness, and a whole lotta confidence. And remember, don’t go burnin’ the house down tryin’ to heat it up.
